| G | Bm | Em | Em7 | C |
| G | Bm | Em |
| I read the | news today oh, | boy |
| C | Em | Am | C |
| About a | lucky man who | made the grade |
| G | Bm | Em |
| And though the | news was rather | sad |
| C | F | Em | Em7 |
| Well I just | had to laugh |
| C | F | Em | C |
| I saw the | photogra | ph |
| G | Bm | Em |
| He blew his | mind out in a c | ar |
| C | Em | Am | Cmaj7 |
| He didn’t | notice that the | lights had changed |
| G | Bm | Em |
| A crowd of peop | le stood and sta | red |
| C | F |
| They’d seen | his face before, |
| Em | Em7 | C |
| Nobody was really sure if | he was from the house of | lords. |
| G | Bm | Em |
| I saw a fil | m today oh, boy |
| C | Em | Am | Cmaj7 |
| The English | army had just | won the war |
| G | Bm | Em |
| A crowd of | people turned | away |
| C | F |
| But I just | had a look |
| Em | Em7 | C |
| Having | read the | book, |
| C | Bm | G | Em |
| I’d love to | turn... | you... | on... |
| E |
| Woke up, fell out of bed, |
| Dsus4 | D | D2 | D | ||||
| Dragged a comb across my | head |
| E | F#m7 |
| Found my way downstairs and | drank a cup, |
| E | F#m7 | B7 | |
| And | looking up I n | oticed I was lat | e. |
| E | |
| Found | my coat and grabbed my hat |
| Dsus4 | D | D2 | D | ||||
| Made the bus in seconds | flat |
| E | F#m7 | B7 | |
| Found my | way upstairs and | had a | smoke, |
| E | F#m7 | |
| and | somebody spoke and I | went into a dream |
| Am | C | G | D |
| Aaaahhhhh |
| E | C | G | D | A |
| G | Bm | Em |
| I read the | news today oh b | oy |
| C | Em | Am | Cmaj7 |
| Four thousand | holes in blackburn, l | ancashire |
| G | Bm | Em |
| And though the | holes were rather | small |
| C | F |
| They had to | count them all, |
| Em | Em7 | C |
| Now they know how many holes it | takes to fill the Albert | Hall. |
| C | Bm | G | Am | E | |
| I’d | love to | turn... | yo | u... | on... |